I never really believed in the idea that you could forcibly create a habit for yourself. Habits, to me, always felt like they arose out of comfort, out of the unsavory things we did to get through the day. At first, forcing myself to run every day I had off seemed like a boondoggle. It felt like, okay, I’m simply making myself hate running more. But, sure enough, after a couple of months, something in my brain changed.
Habit-Forming Isn’t Painless
Running lately has become less of an obligation and more of an expectation. I feel bad if I don’t run. If the weather isn’t absolutely crap and I skip out on a run, I genuinely feel like a part of my day is missing.
But here’s the thing, habit-forming isn’t a painless process. Despite what you may have heard, forcing yourself to do something painful day in and day out is… well… painful. And on top of that, there is no prescribed time until a certain activity becomes ingrained to the point of being impulsive.
For me, it probably took a solid four months of running every day off until I stopped being a dreaded thing and instead became something I genuinely looked forward to. A lot of the initial struggle had to do with early onset foot, ankle, and knee injuries. And if I hadn’t figured out my shoe situation or used braces to ease these injuries, I very well might have given up before I really began.
Religious Running
Running is a lot of things for me now. I won’t say it’s everything, because it’s not and I’m not one of those people. Not yet, at least I hope not. But running does offer an escape. It’s a measurable task that’s as difficult or as easy as I choose to make it on any given day. Finishing a run means I’ve accomplished something for that day. And even if that’s the only thing I can accomplish, it’s a whole lot better than nothing.
On a good day, when the weather is cool but not cold, warm but not hot, and every body part is in proper working condition, a run can feel like a religious experience. There’s a moment, usually after the third or fourth mile, when my legs are fully warmed up and my heart rate is steady, where I feel like I could run forever. In that brief passage of time, not to sound too cliche, every other problem in life falls away. There’s only your feet on the planet and the wind at your face, the sweat of your brow. Of course sometimes there’s pain. But when everything lines up just right, even that fades away. The runner’s high is a real thing.
Excited For This Year
Honestly, the most frustrating thing right now is being sidelined by bad weather. While I’m not afraid to run in sub-freezing temps and have suitable gear for doing so now, when the wind chill drops the temp to below zero Fahrenheit, I’m out. That and I’m coming to terms with the fact that running puts a fairly short lifespan on any given pair of shoes. Some of those old injuries are creeping up on me. Considering I’ve put almost six hundred miles (!) on my pair of adidas in the span of about nine months, I think it’s probably time to retire them.
I find myself excited for this year. I’m excited for warm weather and more long runs. I’m excited to push myself and see how far I can go. Last year when I started training, I could barely run two miles without hitting exhaustion. In December, I finished a half-marathon distance for the first time, thirteen point one miles. It’s crazy to realize what dedication to improvement can achieve. I’m really looking forward to seeing what can be achieved in this coming year, and not just with running.